Tuesday

I ♥ booze

About four months ago I asked my friends what I don’t get enough of in life. Most of them said it was vagina and moustache hair, but my true Zezaurian buddy Dr Dingleberry suggested that I don’t drink enough booze. Crikey, I thought, that’s the most retarded thing I’ve ever heard as I gazed at my bright yellow hands. But then Dr Dingleberry let me try his homemade beer. Now, before this moment I had promised myself I would never love again, but this stuff was just too amazing for words. Three minutes later we had opened the Zezaurian Alcoholics Anonymous Beer and Wine Tasting Dept. and were thinking up ideas for the logo.

In those four months Dr Dingleberry has been busy brewing up some crazy concoctions and we’re now only weeks away from our first sips of ‘Zead’ (yes, it’s Zezaurian Mead, and no, I don’t give a hoot if you think that’s lame). Dr Dingleberry told me last week that it’s "around a billion per cent proof and will shrink your already tiny penis with its potency whilst flying you to Pluto and back."


The Dr also told me that he will need to "milk his brain" as part of the process.

Sorry, mum.

4 comments:

  1. I got a vagina AND a mustache doesn't do me much good...

    http://www.waste-central.com/profile/gllllenda

    ReplyDelete
  2. Dr Dingleberry here!

    I am pleased to announce that the Zead is in its final stages. I have sampled it and I must say that although a billion per cent proof was a guesstimate it is now my pleasure to announce that in fact it's actually a "Zillion" per cent proof!!!!
    Ah! almost forgot to add the the last ingredient "brain milk".

    Feel free to stop by the Surgery any time!

    NEXT!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Holy Swordfish, that's great news Dr. Dingleberry. You can pick the date, mine or yours, and we'll drink until our winkies fall off.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Mate, this is a f*ckin classic site I've told all my mates.
    Funnier than Peter f*ckin Kay.

    ReplyDelete